Skaer-Tactics: Headlines You Will Not Read Here in ‘08

I should have given these to you earlier. However, here are just a few headlines you will not see in The NEWS this year:

21. One Thousand-Year-Old Boiler Finally Dies

20. Solar Power Takes Off in Seattle

19. No New Developments in Thermostats

18. Entire State of Texas Goes Ductless

17. Trane Purchases Carrier Dome

16. Burgers Now Sold at One Hour Heating & Air Franchises

15. Jimmy Hoffa Discovered in Duct Cleaning Job

14. R-123456789 Improved; Good for Washing Uniforms, Too

13. Virtual Contractor Gets Virtual Pay Increase

12. Astronaut-Turned-HVACR Contractor Out of This World

11. China Fails to Copy Anything; USA Still in Shock

10. Al Gore Abandons Global Warming Theory

9. HVAC Licensing Now Mandatory in All 50 States

8. California Bans Air Conditioning, Permits Smoking

7. Summer Months End With No Copper Thefts

6. NATE Runs Out of Certification Exams

5. Contractor Wins Nobel Peace Prize

4. New TV Show Glorifies Technician

3. Millions Sign Up for HVACR Training

2. Golfing, Drinking Banned at Industry Meeting

1. Green Building Movement Dies